Sunday, December 28, 2008

A Little Post Christmas Humor

This next video isn't a commercial hate video. I came across this on youtube and found it so funny that I've decided to post this before continuing on with the campaign against dog shit commercials. Being the holiday season I found it appropriate to share. It is a remake of the classic Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer with a Full Metal Jacket twist.

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Tuesday, December 23, 2008

AT&T Samsung Commercial Hate

This right here is the reason that I have begun to write about my hatred for these hellish piles of bullshit. What in god's name would posses a company to create something so annoying, so outrageous, so disgusting in a despicable attempt to sell a product??!!?? FAIL! This could very well drive me to the edge of insanity if I hear or see this commercial again. Talking thumbs GENIUS! Give me a break! The part with the little Screech Powers looking thumbs saying, "That's insanium in the cranium DAWG!" is like a screeching banshee. Every time I hear that voice it makes me jump out of my skin! Or the part with the thumbs saying, "Shake your money maker!", with that high pitch squeal. Nice skull cap douche bag. I hope you shake your money maker off a cliff! I would rather be chained to a chair in a dark basement with my eye lids taped open forced to watch 2 girls 1 cup on repeat for 36 hours straight than see or hear any part of this disgusting video from hell again. Seriously I cannot take this anymore. It must be stopped. It must be stopped!

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Friday, December 19, 2008

Free Credit Report Commercial Hate

God it makes you wanna cry doesn't it? If there was a national vote on which commercials should never be aired again and all memories of it's existence be erased it would be the free credit report commercials. Now this one really tops them all. Every time I hear even the slightest of sound from this commercial it makes me twitch uncontrollably with anger. When will they stop!?!? I love the one with the guy living in the basement with his mom and dad because that's exactly where he is probably living and writing these horrific sounds from hell! FAIL! What were they thinking? What were they thinking?! I just picture these assholes singing the songs sitting in their parents basement in a little kumbaya circle, rocking back and forth while singing their tunes in pirate costumes finishing with a couple high fives being like, "Awe man that was great, we are awesome bro!"...Wait I take that back. Their parents probably kicked them out of their basement because they hate them as much as the rest of America does! Fuck you free credit report. Fuck you.

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Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Arby's Commercial Hate

You know I used to like Arby's food especially the curly fries, but they now are one commercial away from having me jump off a cliff. I can take it no more, the stupid Arby's hats popping up like a boner in silk boxers, the disgusting quotes, and the stupid ass looks on the actors faces! FAIL! The newest commercial has me seriously contemplating on never watching t.v. again.

Lets stop and think here what this guy was really thinking about by having his wife dress up in an Arby's uniform for his birthday. Was he really thinking about his wife or that fat toothless asshole that delivers him his curly fries on his lunch break? Calm down Tonto. I didn't realize the smell of a moldy big montana could give you an Arby's boner! I know if I asked my wife to dress up in an Arby's uniform and serve me a big montana she would tell me to shove that Arby's hat up my ass! So heres to the new Arby's commercial and everyone involved in making it. FAIL. FAIL. FAIL.

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Monday, December 15, 2008

Taco Bell Commercial Hate

Today's commercial is the new Taco Bell ad featuring the ground breaking "79, 89, 99" song. Featured here:

I have seen this commercial more and more these past few days and all I can say is, FAIL! FAIL! FAIL!
This is one of the most annoying songs I have ever heard in my life and it makes me twitch every time I see or hear this commercial. The young kids scrounging up the change to buy nachos from Taco Bell, hanging out having a great time in the parking lot! Come on! When is the last time you've seen anyone having so much fun over having to scrounge up change to buy nachos from Taco Bell??? Hey guys I have a great idea on what to do tonight. Lets all scrounge up enough change from the couch to go buy nachos from Taco Bell and have a huge dance party in Taco Bell's parking lot! FAIL! With every fist pump during that commercial I lose a little more self control over myself. If I have to see one more idiot fist pump and throw their girlfriend up in the air over the thought of buying a grade z chalupa I might have a heart attack! Here is a thought for the makers of this commercial. How about you go and take some of those tacos and have those assholes from the commercial fist pump them up your ass! Aiy! Aiy! Aiy!

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