Thursday, April 30, 2009

Vacation Time

Taking a vacation. Here's a beauty for the mean time.

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Monday, April 27, 2009

A New Low For Schwarzenegger

This is one of the most ridiculous things I have ever seen in my life! You've gotta love Japan. Even the Governator is not safe from the crazy whacked out minds of Japanese entertainment. Apparently drinking that drink turns you into some sort of hopped up anime freak. What are you people smoking dust? Why the hell is Arnold Schwarzenegger in Japan drinking some hallucinogenic drink that turns him into a laughing mad man??? This commercial is priceless!

Oh but wait... There's more!

ok this one made my brain hemorrhage a little bit.

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Thursday, April 23, 2009

Rambo Stat Sheet

Last night I was watching possibly one of the greatest movies ever made, Rambo IV. Somewhere in between the baby burning and the jugulars being ripped out I was reminded of one of the funniest, most ridiculous stat sheets ever created. The Rambo stat sheet. Ever wonder how many people Rambo killed with his shirt on or off? Well someone actually had enough time on their hands to answer all of your Rambo questions. Chuck Norris has nothing on John Rambo. America.


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Friday, April 17, 2009

Crazy Girlfriend Gets Revenge

I guess you never know what women are really capable of if you piss them off. After watching this it makes me seriously never want to get on a woman's bad side. I hope my girlfriend never sees this video because I don't want her to get any ideas.

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Monday, April 13, 2009

A Little Post Easter Humor

Easter is about making love.

Peeps. Every year with the peeps. I fucking hate peeps and yet somehow manage to acquire enough peeps for a marshmallow army. Well its good to know that there are other people out there that really hate peeps.

P.E.T.A. Fail you motherfuckers fail! Even on Easter you send out your little troll minions to attempt and break the souls of the innocent.

O.K.... What???

Worst fucking Easter basket ever put together! Come on lady put a little effort into your life. What the fuck is anyone supposed to do with this stuff???

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Wednesday, April 8, 2009

How To Really Use ShamWow

As I'm sure you are all aware of ShamWow Vince's recent career change from the methed-up German loving infomercial pimp to the methed-up German hooker boxer. ShamMeth I figured he's gonna need to show his own personal uses of his ShamWow to really sell this product to his newly found audience on his new cell block.

First, every celebrity going to court needs something to hide their face with. Why not try a ShamWow. Perfect size and width for the average German face! ShamCamera

Buff the shit out of that hooker's ass until you can see your face in it. Buy a ShamWow HookWipe now and we'll throw in a bag of meth and some of Pimp Vince's very own HookWax!

slapUse your ShamWow to wipe off your hooker's face after a nightly beating for not wanting to kiss you. Or to wipe that irritating hooker spit from your mouth after choking them.choke

So take it from Pimp Vince. You'll be saying wow every time you use ShamWow!

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Thursday, April 2, 2009

1-800 Safe Auto Hate

Oh hahahahahahaha. What a delightful little jingle. The singing flows into my ears like a carnivorous ear worm eating out the inside of my fucking head! I can not stand any of the Safe Auto commercials, but this one is by far the worst. Two fat ass mall cop looking douche bags walking up to the cars of smiling singing people??? I would love to see the rent-a-cops slap the fucking smiles off their faces, thow them in cuffs and beat them down like they were terrorists. The last person they show is the worst. Hanging her fat head out the window singing that horrible mind raping song. I feel violated every time I see it. I don't ever remember smiling when I was pulled over, but then again I don't have Safe Auto.

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